17 Comments
Oct 28Liked by Sandra Pawula

Wow, Sandra, this is something I have never thought about and thank you for this post! I will need to see what the past traumas are creating in my present life. I have trouble doing "what I am supposed to do" because I get involved in things that are fun and interesting but if done to excess, are a huge waste of time. I really felt for you when you were being denigrated by your boss. He should have been giving you gratitude and praises for your faithful service for the years you worked for him. Not the way to show love, for sure. <3

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Jean, I'm glad you want to explore this idea. It's good to have some fun and interesting diversions, but as you point out, they can quickly become serious distractions. I have to watch out for that myself. I wish you the best with your exploration. That was an intense period in my life, but it was a long time ago, fortunately!

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Oct 27Liked by Sandra Pawula

These two happiness types are so drastically different. Most of society is stuck in hedonisms seeking behaviour I feel 🥹

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Sandra, I'm so sorry for the traumatic experience with your teacher and how his behavior impacted your life. I've not heard happiness described in this way before, so fascinating and helpful!

I'm wondering, from the Tantric lens that I've been aligned with, if we can consciously utilize Hedonia, the external means of happiness, in a way that serves and deepens Eudaemonia? A slippery slope I'm sure if one's casual and willy nilly about choice-making.

I do know that I self-distract. Sometimes it feels helpful for my over-all well being and at other times, not so much. I'm going to be more observant this week in my choice making, how I come to my practices and if I'm feeling resistance. Thank you for a great article and an opportunity for self-reflection.

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Paulette, I love how you've engaged deeply with this view on happiness. Can hedonia facilitate eudaemonia? What a great question! We're just human, and the desire for hedonia is deeply rooted. I see the goal as gradually decreasing unnecessary hedonia and gradually increasing activities that bring eudaemonia. We have to start where we are. I have my distractions, too. I feel we shouldn't judge ourselves for that, but at the same time, as you point out, it's a slippery slope. Thanks for offering your thoughts. I appreciate them so much.

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I like how you make the distinction, Sandra, of unnecessary hedonia. It feels important. Thanks for engaging with me and for the great contemplation.

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Oh, Sandra, my goodness, what a traumatic story! And yet you have come through it as the bright shining person that you are. I am embarrassed to admit that I have lapsed on my meditation practice. Some days trying to fit in my writing, my exercise (I'm a year out from knee replacement) and my work, as well as saving time for my family just overpowers me. But you inspire me to get back to it!

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Oct 26·edited Oct 26Author

Charlotte, It indeed was an intense period of my life! Please don't be embarrassed. It's hard to keep up with everything in our lives, and I imagine your knee replacement required committed time and exercise for an extended period. I'm glad you're inspired to get back into meditation. Thanks for your support, as always.

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Of course the Greeks have words for this distinction 😄 Thanks, Sandra, for passing that knowledge on and sharing part of your journey - you're helping watering my seeds too 💛

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Ann, They would, wouldn't they? Thanks for your appreciation. I am so glad this is helping to water your seeds.

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Oct 25Liked by Sandra Pawula

Oh my gosh, what a wild story. I cannot believe that guy did that to you! How traumatizing. That would make me resist meditation to! I actually do. I procrastinate a lot when it comes to meditation and don’t do it every day even though it makes me feel so much calmer and less stressed! I think it’s because I was really isolated as a teen and I resist the perceived loneliness, but I’m not sure. Lots of things to think about from this amazing article!

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Suzanne, Your empathy and support mean so much to me! What an interesting and potential insight about why you may resist meditation, too. Thanks for sharing that with us. I suspect many of us have deeper reasons for our resistance, which I believe is a common reaction to meditation. I always love hearing your thoughts.

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Oct 25Liked by Sandra Pawula

Wow, I'm so sorry that happened to you. In case you're still wondering, there was nothing spiritual whatsoever about that man. He was an abusive asshole, and nobody deserves that. Screw him. Now *I* need to go meditate to calm down. Grrr. 🤬

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Jennifer,

Oh gosh, sorry to rile you up! Thanks for your enthusiastic support. I absolutely do get that now.

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Oct 25Liked by Sandra Pawula

Lol, that’s okay. Sometimes righteous indignation is what gets me through the day. Could be worse. You and I have a lot in common, so I guess that’s why I find such nonsense to be a bit triggering on your behalf. But I’m fine now, probably. 😆🤪🫠

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Jennifer, It's okay to have whatever reaction you have! You're right; sometimes, we need righteous indignation to get through the day. The story triggered you, and there's a good reason for that. I trust you're fine now, which can also include righteous indignation.

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Thanks for sharing this important information, Sandra. I have also cross-posted this to my Self-love Catalyst Synergy publication as it is super-suitable there.

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